Just Do It... Damn It!

Dear Nike,

First, let me start by saying that your shoes, in general, rock. I love them. Other than a brief fling with Saucony a few years ago, you have always been my top choice in athletic footwear. Love you. Love your slogan, too... "Just Do It!" Brilliant. Seriously, in my opinion, the best slogan out there (do any of the other shoe people even have slogans? Dunno). Anyway, as I say, you rock.

However... I have a tiny bone to pick with you. About 6 months ago, I found the best pair of Nikes E.V.E.R. I mean it. They were the most awesome shoes on the planet. When I put them on, I felt like I'd come home. My feet were so happy. I didn't even need to break them in. Fab.U.Lous. They were even OK in the looks department. I tend to steer away from white shoes (I don't like to be blinded when I look down at my feet) and these were steel grey. Nice. OK, so the fuschia swoosh was not my first choice, but it was understated (if fuschia can be understated). So, I was a happy camper and for the last 6 months I have worn the HELL out of these shoes. Literally. They wore out. Who knew that could happen? Not me. But it seems if you actually EXERCISE in them regularly, they have to eventually be replaced! And that's what happened. A couple of weeks ago I started getting blisters and raw spots on my heel and little toe... ouch. I investigated and yup, the time had come (sniff) to seek out replacement Heaven.

So I marched my butt back to the shoe store last night, expecting (well, hoping anyway) to find the very same shoes as the ones I was retiring. I went straight to the Nike section and there they were! Sort of. They looked basically the same, but something was different... the toe was sort of squared and strangely turned up. See, my shoes were the 'V' series and the new ones are the 'VI' series. You tweaked them in order to add a Roman numeral. You tweaked perfection, Nike, and I'm not happy about it. I put them on, though, thinking they might FEEL the same, even if they didn't quite look it. They were OK but not quite Heaven. And when my daughter looked at them, she said, "You look like Aladdin. Or a Christmas elf." And I did! It was the damned turned-up toe! Why, Nike?! Why?! I'm generally a function over form girl but come on! Aladdin?! A Christmas Elf?! I don't think so.

I tried on few more pairs... one was silver and made me look like Buck Rogers. All I needed was the white jumpsuit. Even my daughter said they were too sparkly (and when something's TOO sparkly for HER... geez-us!). Another pair was so white, I needed my sunglasses to look at them. I finally settled on brown ones with a blue swoosh. Not bad. Pretty comfy (but not Heaven, Nike. Not Heaven). And my daughter says I now need new workout clothes, as all my sweats are black or grey and won't match. Great. Thanks for that.

Anyway, Nike, what I'm getting at (in my rather long-winded way) is that I just want you to stop tweaking! Just leave well enough alone! Make a pair of shoes and LEAVE THEM BE. Everything on the planet doesn't have to be 'new and improved'! Some things are just FINE the way they are. Some things are HEAVEN. And while you're at the whole no tweaking thing, just go ahead bring back my 'V' series, steel grey, fuschia swoosh running shoes, will you? Seriously. Just do it. Damn it.

Sincerely,

Diane