Or Leave Me Love, You Lovely Lurkers!
Note: Before you start reading, please understand this is really not a whine (or a whinge, if you're from the UK, Oz, or NZ). It's simply me being obsessive and dorky (and if you know me at all, you know that 'obsessive' washes over me in an occasional wave, and 'dorky'... well... 'dorky' is pretty much my perpetual state).
OK, so a while ago, my friend Mel told me I should totally get this Feedjit thing for my blog. Feedjit? What’s Feedjit, says I. Only the coolest thing ever, says she. Turns out, Feedjit is this thingy you can load onto your blog which tells you from whence your visitors come (yes, as a matter of fact, my last name is Shakespeare). For those of you living in the 21st century, it tells you where your peeps come from (9-year-old slang and dangling participles aside). It shows each visitor’s city, country, browser, OS, arrival time, and whether or not they access you directly (like from their favorites list… awww) or from a blog. And it gives you a map with flags to show you where each place is, in case you’re geographically-challenged and think Aarhus is in Canada instead of Denmark, for example (which I did not, as I’m actually not geographically-challenged, but I’ve talked to some of you long enough now to know… well… just sayin’).
Anyway, it sounded cool. So I gave Mel my password (which I changed right after she was finished, ‘cause I totally don’t trust that woman since she’s not very integritous) and she added it to my blog for me. I would have done it myself but it required import of a widget (or something like that) and I don’t know what a widget is (I thought it was like a thingamajig but apparently it’s a real techno-thing).
So now I have Feedjit. I spent the first day with it feeling pretty much like an eedjit (which is ‘idiot’ for those who don’t speak Scottish). It took me a while to figure how it works exactly. OK, ‘exactly’ might be a slight exaggeration. I sort of figured out how it kind of works. It does stump me sometimes, like when it said one of my bloggy friends arrived at my site from England when I happened to know she was in Pennsylvania at that very moment. Mel explained that someone in England probably came to me through her blog (which made more sense than her catching the Concorde to Heathrow and reading my blog when she got there).
So it is cool, but there are a few things about Feedjit which are driving me slightly nuts…
Before Feedjit, I didn’t know how many people visit my blog. Now I do. Lots of people visit. Not nearly so many comment. Some come back over and over and never say a word. Why? Don’t they like me? Am I boring? Do they hate my writing; my subject matter; the way I tend to go on and on and on…? That doesn’t make sense if they visit over and over, right? Why oh why won’t they comment?!
It’s kind of making me sad and bringing back memories of that complex I had in high school.
I’m also constantly trying to figure out who everyone is. Some people are easy, especially if they access directly and I recognize their cities. But some are hard… like, the person (or people?) from Edinburgh who visits often. Did you know I was born in Edinburgh, dear lurker? I’d love to talk to you! And the people in Virginia (especially the ones in Pigsknuckle and Charlottesville)… do I know you? Talk to me! I’m nice! I’m friendly! Really! Send me an email if you’d like. I did that with Lee, way back in the beginning of my bloggy adventure. I didn’t know protocol and I felt weird commenting out of the blue, so I sent him an email to tell him how much I liked his blog. And he replied! We’ve been trading bloggy love ever since.
The cool thing is, I can now see when my family and closest friends (who pretty much never comment... talk about giving a girl a complex!) come to visit. Iain, I can see you (and you should be working, you slacker). And Todd, even though you have totally sucked at emailing lately, I’ll forgive you because I know you’re watching me (in a totally non-creepy-yet-still-stalkerish way).
Anyway, I’m weighing the positives of Feedjit with the negatives. I know I’m an eedjit to be over-thinking it the way I am, but over-thinking things is what I do. And the truth is, I actually do understand it all. Really.
~ I understand you’re not going to like every post you read.
~ I understand that some posts will be too long (like this one, perhaps?) and you might not have the time or inclination to plow through them.
~ I understand that even if you do like a post, you just might not have anything to say.
~ And I understand there are people out there who just like to peek into others’ lives (like I do into windows when I go for a walk at night and people leave their curtains open) and they have no desire for any sort of relationship.
See? I am perceptive (it’s actually one of my best things). I’m not really as needy and pitiful this post makes me sound (I said not really)... I’m just someone who thrives on connection and knowing there are potential connections just outside my grasp is driving me nuts!
So, regardless of whether I keep or chuck Feedjit, I’d love it if all you lovely lurkers left me some love! And if you’re loathe to leave love, well, I still love that you lurk so lurk for as long as you like!
42 comments:
Wow, did you ever think the installation of a little tool like Feedjit would lead to such existential angst? Breathe!
oh, and love this week's quote.
Everyone gets lurkers. It's part of the blogging. Maybe I should start lurking just to get you going. That might be fun...since you could tell now. Hmm...
AWWW I have no idea what you are talking about but I want one of those!
Love!
well jeez - now I am going to feel existential guilt if I don't comment when I visit...
Thanks for your comment on Laughing On the Way Out!
i think alot of lurkers feel awkward leaving comments for folks they don't know. they'll get over it....
Ah, Diane, I have had Feedjit for months now! It is indeed cool.;)) I can see that someone from my town is visiting but not leaving any comments.
It is a very nifty little gadget, please have fun exploring the geography of your fans.;))
I use stat counter. Which I love. It gives me a map of where people come from which is AWESOME because I get to puff up my ego every few days when I see that people from Korea, Australia and other 'really cool places' come to visit. But ya, what's UP with the non commenters? I mean, why do they keep coming back if they can't find something to say. It doesn't even need to be nice, right? They could say 'hey your blog is lame' and I'd be happy because then I could hunt them down and ... well, never mind.
Good for you for getting techy...and don't feel bad that Mel had to put it on. I have to do that for my BFF (Guinhyvar, in case you forgot!) LOL ... what we won't do for people we love!
I'm one of your followers and enjoy reading your writing. I'll try to leave more comments because I also love when my readers do the same.
Ok now i may have to move around to different states and countries so you can't track me down!!!
I am packing as i type this!!! I can't tell you where i am going though!!! You will just have to use your Feedjit widget thingy to find me!!!!
Happy Sunday girlie!!!
I haven't gotten to the point where lurkers drive me nuts yet but I can feel the frustration mounting.
I have something similar called (wait for it) Site Meter that pretty much does the same thing. Within a week, I had to stop reading the email updates because of how many people just came without leaving any comments whatsoever and the ensuing frustration. Grrr
Anyways, good luck with your Feeding.
Dearest Twinnie Diane (or is it triplet now?!). Votre blogger du jour from Edinburgh, c'est moi!
I'm not actually in Edinburgh, as you know, just over the border in Northumberland, but I noticed on another blog I was reading that the technical gizmojobbie was showing me up as frae auld Reekie!
So, I think it was me - Before, when I lurked, before I learned from you beauties and created my own identity, and found wonderful writers and raconteurs such as you in turn!
So, I shall leave some love as you are super deserving, and not at all pitiful, and when you say obsession washes over you from time to time, I got panic instead in my 'frequent wash' programme! By the way, I think you got the better part of the bargain.
Oh, and I am the older twin, as I was 45 (whisper it!) in December. Time to turn the clock back a bit, don't you think? Allmylove, Fx
I love this widgit too, especially when others post comments so I can visit their blogs. Even if it's a short note, especially when you're new to the blogosphere, it's encouraging!
Congrats, Diane!
diane or bardess, i now fear you. i wouldnt add it. it might give me a (bigger) complex.
I thought I should tell you before you found out from someone else - I gossiped about you on my blog yesterday. ;o)
I'm leaving this comment because you know that I know that you know that I'm here.
Okay, creepy girl, what are you doing looking into other people's windows? If they only had a feedjit for that! Of course it would all say from their town, so I don't know what good it would do. And, because you once told me you couldn't remember any French from high school except for WC, AWONI said that she was you blogger of the day from Edinburgh. Except for I just wrote blooger. There's a word verification for you. By-the-way, I show up as anything from Matthews, to Charlotte, to Monroe, to Mooresville, or Kannapolis. Weird!
So it's kinda like stalking your stalkers.....interesting. but you lost me at the technial stuff. I can't even do links right LOL!
Well here is my comment, the trouble with this feedjit wotsit, is it isnt very accurate. It says that I came from La Roche-Sur-Yon..well it may be a lovely place..but I have no idea where it is. I just have a map of the world thing on mine, which is equally interesting. PS..I have a count on my blog but cannot view it at the moment.
PPS...Yes the photos are all mine even the funny ones. take care Blu
Just showin some bloggin love...
Dear Sweet Thing, possibly too much information! It is blogger navel fluff. I have a stats thing on my blog but I have to log into it so only go there every so often and there are lots of folk who visit for less than a few seconds. No idea what their story is.
BTW: Your feedjit thing seems to suggest that I come from Glen Waverley, not true. Not even particularly close. Certainly wouldn't want to walk to it. Right city, though.
Hi - I usually read you via google reader therefore you don't even know that I have been lurking! So that would be a double surprise for you.
If you don't know what google reader is I can easily help you spy on how many read you without your knowledge ... there are so many ways to drive yourself crazy and I'd like to help!
So this is me, Candid Carrie, from Sheboygan Wisconsin.
I love that you wrote this post! All that angst that you're expressing here is EXACTLY why I don't yet have Feedjit. I started to sign up for it and I knew it would make me crazy, so decided to wait until I could get in a few more sessions with my therapist before taking the leap. It's coming though... and when it does you will know that I'm ready to tackle all that mental anguish that goes along with it.
Ok first of all... Lee lives in Glen Waverley?? I used to live there ;) lol... Well actually it was mount waverley which is the suburb next to it... but still who'da thunk it?
Second of all...
At the very bottom of my blog in an icognito place is one of those site stats things (yes that is the technical name for it)...
If i'm to believe it... There is one person who seems to never leave my blog..24/7... is just constantly there like some kind of praying mantis (not that praying mantis's blog but if they did i imagine they'd be lurkers)
Heres to you my friend and to all the eedjits like me who are fascinated by this widget stuff!!!
Lotsa love, M
bitch - you know what i'm talking about!!! ;)
Mel, Mel, Mel... temper, temper, temper! I only did it because I know what a perfectionist you are and I knew you'd hate it if you had a spelling error on your blog. And, of course, I did it because I love you, Pal O'Mine. And here, you call me a bitch. On my own blog, even. Tsk, tsk, tsk.
I looked at it to see if it said where I was from, it had the state right but totally the wrong city.
Flamin Nora, Diane you don't half go on (and on and on) you're nearly as bad as me girl... OK I get the point about feedjit sp?? Oh ta Hell! doesn't matter anyhow. Right where do I start? My name is Kate and I live in Glasgow, I'm sure we've spoken before, nevermind anyway, I really love the way you 'go on missus' it's like I'm sitting listening to you talk while I'm trying haphazardly to make sense of what you're saying - Yeah I know I sound as though I'm nuts - but bear with me I'm not really. Uh oh.. I hear movement next door my dear husband has cometh in to see what I'm up to - as though I could get up to anything next door to our bedroom for goodness sake. He thinks I'm doolally writing to someone on the other side of the world when it's bedtime - well it is after 12.30am and I'm still sitting at this ruddy machine (what he calls it! So I'd better get off my PC and get to my bed or I'll never get up in the morning (his words)- aye that 'will' be right - sure as God made little apples I'll flaming be wakened at 7 am tomorrow morning.... argghhh!
Cheers from the land of the Tartan, Kate x.
I quite like the sound of 'lurker' - a certain wickedness about it! Unfortunately I am more of a blurter.
Oh I hear you! I obsess over my Feedjit thing ... until I just got tired of it. If you don't have it already, you should ask Mel to give you a stat counter that tells you really detailed stuff like what search terms people used to get to, where they went after they left you, how many pages they read, what they read. But maybe not -- it may make you mad based on your reaction to Feedjit (or howwever it is spelled).
And I LOVE taking walks at night and peeking into people's houses (not in Peeping Tom way but in a "how do they decorate" and "wow...that is a really ugly wall color" way).
And your daughter the fish is just adorable!
I'm leaving a comment so I do not add to your complex ;-)
I wandered over here from Sherri's site... And I have a tracker on my blog. There is someone in Palo Alto who religiously reads my blog but never comments. I've even personally given them a shout out and asked them to 'drop a line'. Nothin'. My ex's wife looks at my blog every day - and it's rather creepy in a stalker kind of way. The best part though is seeing what people google to end up on my site. Brilliant.
Does this count as a comment?
Oooh, I want a feedjit! Then I could see all 10 or 12 people that might visit my blog occasionally. Ha! I bet you're in the 100s, huh? You bloggy skank, you. :) Just kidding, of course. How complicated is it to install said feedjit? Or is that something I should be talking to Mel about?
You're a women so of course you are over thinking this, and well, probably all sort of other things as well. You can't help yourself, it's a fault of your sex.
I say drop the Feed thing. Who gives a shit where people come from and if they don't post. Do what you do because you like it, not because you want strangers to stroke your ego.
-Alan
i have one of those site meter things too and when i first put it up i checked it ALL the time and tried to figure out who was who. now i don't pay so much attention to the details but i do look at the numbers : ) we're all comment/number whores to some degree. and also, my location depends on if i'm looking at something from work or home. work comes from a totally different state (some techno server crap i'm sure) and home comes from the right state but totally wrong city. weird.
Just so you know, I have read it all! ;-) I use Sitemeter, which does a very similar job, and I have written about the funny business of stats a couple of times myself. Apart from what you and others have said I have noticed there is sometimes a significant geographical discrepancy when it comes to the location of the visitor since the stats services seem to go by where the Internet Provider's servers are, not you yourself. And it also seems to vary, but I am not entirely sure. If you have plenty of time, there is a lot of nerdy fun to have with the stats provided. This was a substantial comment, but I have to admit to lurking sometimes myself, sorry!
Think of your blog like a newspaper. Fun to read even though you seldom write a letter to the editor. Well, i don't, anyway.
Now I want to begin lurking (is that called de-commenting?) so I can say I'm partially responsible for the development of your complex!
Hey...the feedjit thing is a mixed blessing...no one ever leaves me comments :( It's OK though - my blogs really all about the kids and THEY couldn't really care less about whether they get comments or not. Anyway...thanks for your comment on our Baltimore trip!!
I'm just going to add you to my list of bloggers, so if you get a hit from Chester UK that's me.... even though I don't live in Chester lol !!
For me personally when I read a funny/interesting blog, and you think you're own is probably quite boring in comparison, it is hard to write a comment :o)
I came hunting for your blog because of a comment over here from sherri, and I wanted to read your post that she said brought her to tears.
But then I kept reading, and I just about died laughing at this post. I used to run a rather large website, and I always loved to marvel at all the visits from everywhere.
So I figured I'd leave a comment and refrain from driving you nuts. Greetings from Houston Texas. :)
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