formerly Diane's Addled Ramblings... the ramblings are still addled, just like before, and the URL is still the same...
it's just the title at the top of the page that's new

Monday, May 21, 2012

Here is Where I Need to Be...

What I know for sure: No matter where you are on your journey, that’s exactly where you need to be. The next road is always ahead. No, I wouldn’t take nothing for my journey now.” Oprah Winfrey

Those are the last words in June’s edition of O, The Oprah Magazine. I like Oprah. I know a lot of people don’t, but I really do. I like how she seems so willing and able to admit her shortcomings and failures – often publicly – and move on from them to attain (what seems to me to be) a higher level of understanding of herself and what she needs from – and can contribute to – Life. It’s impressive.

Anyway, those words, about Life’s journey, hit me hard when I read them yesterday. I love it when I’m struggling with an issue – some inner turmoil or frustration – and then I see or hear or read something that shines a light on it and makes it a bit clearer.

No matter where you are on your journey, that’s exactly where you need to be.”

I’ve spent a lot of time regretting some things I’ve done in life. I’ve been angry at myself, often, for what I consider to be failures. I berate myself for my shortcomings. I beat myself up for poor decisions I’ve made and holler at myself when I misstep and fall into a hole. I see those things as set-backs to attaining the life I really want. (I'm often quite hideous to myself, really.)

But what if they’re not really set-backs?

What if those failures, shortcomings, poor decisions, and missteps are simply things that are supposed to happen to get me to where I need to be?


Now, I’m not a believer in fate or a ‘divine plan.’ I don’t even believe in God in the conventional sense (or even some of the unconventional ones). But I refuse to believe that we’re here simply to take up space and use up our Earth’s valuable resources. I want to believe that we each have some sort of purpose. And I do believe there’s something beyond this existence (I’ve seen too many episodes of Ghost Hunters and Long Island Medium not to!) and I often wonder if we simply move on to the next plane to work out some of the stuff we never got around to working out here.

So, as I say, what if those failures, shortcomings, poor decisions, and missteps are actually what’s necessary to lead us toward our purpose?

I don’t know.

I don’t know a lot of stuff.

But I have to admit, I like that idea. I’ve certainly noticed how Life has thrown a few (crappy) things at me over and over and over.  But when I finally figure out the lesson, I move forward. Interesting, no? And when I’m resistant to learning the lesson, Life steps up the game and hits me harder. Does that mean I think Life targets me and throws things at me – or rewards me – deliberately? No. I don’t think Life does anything to us.  As I say, I don’t believe Life has a plan. But I’ve definitely seen patterns and similarities in the obstacles I seem to encounter – in the lessons I need to learn to move forward. And I’ve come to realize that in learning the lessons, I also develop the tools to avoid or overcome the same sorts of hits in the future. So it seems that Life is going easier on me… but it’s me, really, who is handling Life better.

So I really like the idea of those failures, shortcomings, poor decisions, and missteps being stepping stones rather than obstacles. I like the idea that instead of flinging myself down the stairs when I screw up big, I can use the screw up as a step up. I like that instead of getting so frustrated with Life or myself for what happens to me, I can simply accept that I’m where I need to be, learn from my situation, and move forward.

I like it a lot.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a few lessons to learn.


Anne said...

I recently read something kinda similar to what you're saying - life puts a lesson in your way until you figure out what to do with it, but don't be surprised if you get that same thing again later in order to learn it on a deeper level.

Ducky said...

I absolutely believe that every decision, good or bad, has led to me today and where I need to be on my journey. And while there are many things I am not proud of and choose to not recall about my past, I wouldn't change them. I wouldn't go back and re-do it because I can' guarantee it wouldn't also alter the path I am on now and I absolutely wouldn't change that for anything!

SueAnn Lommler said...

Brick walls and missteps are definitely stepping stones and directional arrows!! So I put on my big girl pants and trudge on with a crooked smile on my face. Glad that I am not alone!!!

Jen said...

Wow, does this post resonate with me. I've always been a "dreamer", which has unfortunately resulted in me "failing" quite often. But, I do try to learn something about myself from each "failure", and I do feel that the people who never try anything new are more of a "failure" than I am. Often something great comes from the "failure", too. For instance, I had an interview for a job I really wanted and didn't get. But, during that interview, I was given information that I ended up desperately needing in the future.
I love your attitude and I hope this year brings many wonderful things your way!

Sometimes Sophia said...

I'm with Jen. I love your attitude. I struggle because so many things in my life are difficult. I don't write about them - the stuff that makes me feel ancient and sad - but it seems that I constantly screw up or am trying to succeed where I've failed before. One word: humbling.
Makes one really appreciate that which is beautiful, true, and intrinsically good.

Kasey said...

I definitely look at failures and obstacles as stepping stones. I think we are always right where supposed to be and every choice we make (or crisis we go through) leads us somewhere else. It's not always an easy way to look at things but it's a good perspective to have!

J Cosmo Newbery said...

Yep, all part of the learning process.

Introverted Art said...

I guess we have been there. And will continue to as long as we live (by the way, I am a MAJOR procrastinator too)

dianne said...

This is a good post dear Diane. I believe that every decision I have made whether god or bad has brought me to this stage of my life's journey and yes I am supposed to be here for the present. I am learning about my mistakes and find as I get older that I am slightly wiser and can avoid some of the pitfalls of the past. I would not say that I am completely comfortable here, I still have so much to learn and I am looking forward to the next stage of my life with a little more wisdom.
xoxoxo ♡

hebba said...

I have been struggling to get my head around this exact same message in my own way. (once again, you and I, Diane, inhabit parallel universes!)

alphawoman said...

That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger. There is truth in adages.